Chilihead: Hello?
Husband: Hey! I just finished some almonds. Caaaaandieeeed almonds. Should I get you some?
Chilihead: What? Yes. Get me some candied almonds and bring them home with you tomorrow. Whatever. Thank you for calling to rub that in, my afternoon is complete.
Husband: Guess what KIND of candied almonds they are?
Chilihead: The candied kind? With sugar? And almonds?
Husband: They are EPCOT candied almonds!
Chilihead: You are NOT in EPCOT without us!
(In the background I hear the familiar Por favor, mantengan se allejado de las puertas.)
Chilihead: You are NOT on the monorail without us!
Husband: I had some extra time after my business meeting and thought I’d get some almonds. At EPCOT. And now I’m getting on the monorail to go to The Magic Kingdom. To get more almonds.
Chilihead: KIDS! Your daddy is at Disney World without us! Let’s go get ice cream and show him who’s boss!
Hello, my name is not Inigo Montoya. Prepare to die anyway.
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
That is hilarious. At least he called to rub it in…
Well, that took some nerve. I think it calls for Happy Meals AND ice cream!
Mr. Right would be lucky to get walk back into our house after that kind of tease. He’d better bring almonds, chocolate AND mouse ears.
And I think a trip to a spa and a Harry Connick Jr. concert is even more in order…
Shame, shame! He better bring big bags of candied almonds home for the family and all of your blog readers too:)
The cad.
If he is a smart guy he is probably buying you a super cool gift right now. Mickey Mouse ears maybe?
Oh NO he didn’! Men, what will we do with them!
Hey, I gave you an award today. I know, I know you probably have no more room on your bloggy mantel, but what the heck!
Okay, I’ve been there. Once you get over the initial shock the sadness sets in. Let yourself grieve, don’t be afraid to cry. He’s hurt you in an unforgiveable way but trust me when I say this: your marriage (and more importantly your joint vacations to the happiest place on earth) can be saved, and even made stronger. The first step in calling him and ordering him to bring you home a new Disney tee. Then, let the healing begin Chili, let the healing begin.
That is just SO wrong on so many levels. Disney World is SERIOUS business. He, as a married man and father should not go alone. Who will control the magic carpet to make sure the camel spits on him? Who will ride Kali River Rapids with him and laugh when the tube turns at the last minute and he gets soaked while the rest of the family stays dry?
Plus all the rides are designed for even numbers.
And really, there are all these single princesses running around. Can he remain faithful if Snow White or Cinderella starts flirting? What about Minnie? She wears seriously short skirts.
No. No. No. This is just not going to work. You should leave now. He needs you.
i had no idea that the almonds at epcot were so… special!
What a traitor! HA!