Dear Dr. Chili:
I have a problem with my mother. She sees dead people. Well, she
doesn’t exactly see them. She likes to talk about them. To be exact,
she likes to phone me and tell me who has died. My problem? This isn’t
my favorite topic.
Can you help me, Dr. Chili?
Signed,
Morbidly Annoyed
Dear Morbidly Annoyed: Buy your mother cable, introduce her to John Edward, and change your phone number. Also? Haley Joel Osment called. He wants his schtick back.
***
Dear Chili,
How would you handle a mother-in-law
who has "shown out" two years in a row at Christmas?
This year….we weren’t all there at
4:00 (the time she had in her head) and we got there at 5:00 to….NO ONE….
She left! And didn’t return……!
And is still mad at us……………!
Dear …………..!,
First, learn to use ellipses.
Second, learn to use a Ouija board.
Third, be happy. If she was really "showing out" you’d have to shield the youngin’s eyes.
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Is my eyesight getting worse? Oh no, it this the first sign that I will soon see dead epople???!
Dr. Chili,
Please tell Jules, er I mean, Morbidly Annoyed, that talking about dead people comes with age. It’s a geriatric came of one-upsmanship — if someone else is dead and your’re not, you win!
are these questions for real?